if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
