she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize