Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
