there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
