I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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