Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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