Christians are straight up FREAKS
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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