I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize
