dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
We had to coat check the pizza.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
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