You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize