Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
porn star boner night. come get it.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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