She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
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