took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
