But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
