Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I have feelings that need drinking.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
