I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
