dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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