Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
