She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I want her autograph on my taint
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
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