is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
