yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You pole danced in your parka.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
