I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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