Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
