maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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