I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
