dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
