did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You made out with two different species that night
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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