he thought i was a dude.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
