In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
