Where did you get a picture of my penis
I think I died a long time ago.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
