It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
