you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
