I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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