Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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