Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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