oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
