So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
