how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
