love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Randomize
