If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
