Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
