everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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