dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize