Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
