what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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