He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
