so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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