Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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