sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
