i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
