I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
