Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
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