whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize